| bad company 3: kroegs and them |

Nickelback is funny to me. They've sold over 30 million records worldwide. Their last album, The Dark Horse, went 8x platinum in the States. How they have accumulated such impressive sales records is beyond me. Despite the constant hatred from casual listeners and experienced critics alike, the Vancouver-based rockers seem to keep trucking along.

Today, the Province ran an article on Nickelback frontman Chad Kroeger. The teaser on the front page read:

"Nickelback frontman fires mom, denies concert tickets for kids"

Reading this, one is lead to believe that Kroeger canned his own mom. Alas, the "mom" in this case was his housekeeper. The "kids" are her kids, who were huge Nickelback fans. My first favourite part of the article is the headline: "Five Abbotsford brothers think Chad Kroeger's not at all cool."


Really? This is news? Portugal knew that years ago. Rolling Stone has been slagging these fools for nearly a decade now, yet it took the firing of their mom to get these kids to see things clearly? Here is an excerpt from an open letter the 11 year-old wrote to the Province:


"We dont think your cool and we took your stupid picture off our rockstar wall cause you dont deserve to sit up there with john lennon, mick jagger or bob dylan."

Before reading this, I felt sorry for this family. Single mom - with five kids at home - makes a living cleaning other people's houses. Not exactly the pinnacle of life, if you ask me. But what the hell is fucking Nickelback doing on the same wall as John Lennon, Mick Jagger, and Bob Dylan? This could be a $100 question on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire: "Which one of these do not belong?" That's like finding imitation imitation crab on your Deluxe Lobster Platter at dinner (Yes, I meant to write "imitation" twice). I don't blame these kids; they're young and wouldn't know the difference between an Oh Henry bar and a nutty log of shit. I do blame the mom - she really should know better than that. Hence, I don't feel bad for her for getting fired. Besides, she shouldn't have been trying on Kroeger's girlfriend's clothes. That's kind of weird.